Wednesday, May 7, 2014

What Tinder Taught Me

It all started out with my roommate and I sitting in our living room one August night, bored out of our minds. We were sick of going to the hot tub, watching movies, going out to eat, or even just talking with one another. As we contemplated what we should do for the night, she asked me if I had heard of an app called "Tinder". She went on to explain to me that it was some sort of dating app that you can swipe right or left to people. After a few minutes of talking about how weird the concept was, we both turned on our phones and downloaded the app. We created a profile with a catchy tagline and cute photos. It started off with us just laughing at the weird looking guys, what pictures they had, and gushing over really attractive guys. Downloading the app began as a joke. 10 months later, it's not so much a joke anymore.

I've learned a lot about this app and using it for dating in the past ten months. I still use it on a daily basis and for dating reasons. I don't get asked out by guys at school or even in my ward. I don't often have guys make a pass at me, but this way, I've met so many more guys and have gone on so many more dates than if I wasn't on it. So, what have I learned? Well, here it is:

~Everyone has a "type" | meaning you like certain physical attributes and features of others. I always thought I was pretty open minded. False. I tend to like and "swipe" to blonde hair with blue eyes. Not always, but often.

~When it comes to this app, we are all very shallow | I used to read every tagline, but now I've found myself just swiping. If I think he's physically attractive, I like him. Shallow.... I know....

~There isn't an easy way to start a conversation with a complete stranger | honestly, a simple "hey" or "how are you doing" goes much farther than trying to drop a pick up line. Trust me. Boys/Men, consider actually looking at the girl's tagline and ask her questions about it. Spark conversation.

~If there are two guys in the main photo, chances are that the actual guy is going to be less attractive | been there, learned that. Swipe at your own discretion.

~Girls, if a guy messages you late at night, he's probably only wanting a hookup | use your common sense and listen to your instincts.

~You can meet someone from Tinder, and they wont kill you | people think that this app is really really sketchy, which, it can be. I've met 9 guys in those ten months and only 2 of the 9 were bad news, and I am still in contact with 4 of them.

~It seems like every guy in Utah County loves hitting the gym or being outdoors

~Guys, just because my profile says I love sports and I'm the athletic photographer for UVU, doesn't mean I have a rocking body or that I'll be your gym buddy, sorry | if I had a penny for every time a guy asked me how often I workout, I'd be rich.

~Tinder is an automatic ego boost | don't believe me? just wait until you "match" with someone...and he's very attractive. Even on my worst days, I feel better for a few seconds when I see a new notification.

~Tinder taught me to take chances | I met with guys I normally wouldn't give myself a chance with because I thought they were way too attractive for me. I also learned how to trust myself and if I felt comfortable with people and situations.

~Some of the guys you meet can become close friends | many of the guys I went on dates with were wonderful, but something was missing. So we often didn't want to pursue each other to date. Instead, we still kept in contact, texted, messaged, saw each other in person and established a friendship. These boys are some that I've gone to if I need dating advice or someone to talk to and visa versa.

~Tinder can be what you make of it | if you are looking for a hookup, you'll be finding all of the guys that just want to make out. If you are looking to date and possibly meet someone, then you will find them. It's the way that you portray yourself on your profile and the way that you talk with your matches on the app. Be smart with what details you post and be aware of the persona you are putting out there.

I think that Tinder is both a great thing and an evil thing. It's much like the internet. You can use it for good, or use it for evil. I know of couples that met on Tinder and I recently had a friend who just got married to a man she met on the app and they are some of the happiest people I know!

-Linsey

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